Suspicions and doubts
When you live with someone for more than ten years, you get to know that person well. You can tell when he is feeling well or not, when he is upset or when he is hiding something from you. For the past six months I have been noticing that my husband changed some of his daily habits. He started to exercise, take walks (which he never liked to do before) and he applied for a new position within his company. So unlike him!
At the beginning, I imagined that it was all due to the middle age crisis and I did not pay much attention these signs. When I saw that his work took him more often than usual abroad, I raised an eyebrow, asking myself what was I missing.
Two days ago when he mentioned he had to change management business application Phoenix and he had to be away for a whole week, I knew that he was lying straight to my face. All the other times he was travelling for work, he had not been away from home for more than two or maximum three days.
A whole week delegation that sounded strange. I was convinced there was something fishy about it. My first assumption was that he was having an affair with someone either from his office, or someone he had met abroad in one of his previous office trips.
I was not sure how to react and how to approach this topic with him. Since it was only a suspicion and I had no proof, all there was left for me to do was waiting. Waiting and observing. Gathering more proof. Hoping that I was wrong.
This weekend I invited one of my friends to come over and stay with me. I did not feel comfortable being alone. That’s mostly because I knew I would have thought only about the gap between us. I wished to do something different. I wanted to have fun. Fun like in the old days when I did not give a damn about work, chores and responsibilities.
Yes, I am aware that sounded like I was running away from my problem instead of dealing with it. Towards the end of the evening, I finally opened my heart and told my friend all about my fears. She advised me to be careful and take care of myself, financially speaking. She recommended me a divorce lawyer as well. I was not there yet.